Monthly Archives: December 2011

Another Dark December

Yesterday would’ve been my favorite night this December.
I was gonna be at my parents house for a dinner party, but my parents invited last minute
guests who I’m not so “cozy” with…

so I decided to go out instead.

I saw so many friends I haven’t seen in ages.
Even an AWESOME surprise, BJ Monroe, who know lives in Florida.
I haven’t seen that guy since I was like 13 years old!!!!

Saw my “lil bro” Davide.
And countless others who are in town for the holidays.
It was truly becoming a night to remember.

I saw my “future husband/baby daddy” Bobbie and wanted to sneak up on him.
As I was in the middle of doing that, my sweet cutie pie friend Ryan
tried to get me to come over…
splashed with a surprised smile of “Cara, you’re here!!!”
and his arms open ready to give me a hug.

But, I told him one second and ran over to Bobby first cuz he’s been begging me to come and hang out
for weeks.
After chatting up the gang, I went back to find Ryan…

and he was nowhere to be found.


About 3AM this morning, I find out why he probably went MIA…
his father was in a bad car accident and passed away.


On the way out last night, I drove past an accident.
There were so many cars lined up the road.
Obviously friends and family who heard of the accident
and probably some nosy onlookers.
The lights of the ambulance and police cars were just sucking up the darkness of the night
and setting the tone.

Driving by, my heart felt heavy and tight.
I knew I’d have something to read about in the next day’s paper

but I didn’t think it’d be so close to home.

The year almost made its reset and moved on.

Almost, without sadness.

Last year, a friend died at dinner on Christmas Day.
December’s really turning out to be a really tragic month around these parts…

Let’s hope we get through to 2012 without anymore additions.

So sorry Ryan baby.

I love you and am here for you.

R.I.P. Steve Cartwright

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Posted by on December 31, 2011 in Alcohol & Drugs, Bahamas, Death, Family


Hmmmmmmmmm. New toy???


Ain’t she a beauty?

She was in the paper again. My dad pointed it out.
It’s weird. I never had my dad so on me to buy a bike.
Maybe he’s trying to “cheer” me up.

I dunno.

 I think he notices I “miss” something when I’m here in the Bahamas.
I HATE driving here.

And can’t usually be bothered to go anywhere, cuz it feels so far away.
The island’s dimensions are 96 miles long and 17 miles across…
but only about 1/6th of that, if even, anyone really uses on an average day.

10-15 minutes tops from point A to B, for the furthest points.

I can’t stand 15 minutes!

It’s all relative.
In Florida or other parts in the states, I can drive for HOURS.
No problem.


Asking me to drive 10-15 minutes is like asking me to run a marathon with sweats on…
in a desert, in Africa, during the height of summer.


It’s just THAT serious.
With a bike though, commute time is cut down to about 5 mins and, it’s FUN!

I’m going to wait until the New Year flows through and see how I feel.
But, I went to sleep with it staring me in the face on my laptop’s 18.4″ screen.
Yeah, no.

Turned my new MacBook Pro 17″ on, once.
Haven’t used it since.
I didn’t know it then, but I’m still in love with my Toshiba
even though, in the beginning of our relationship

it was being such a pain in the ass.




Posted by on December 30, 2011 in Motorcycles


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What I Learn, When I Leave the House…

The market value for cocaine has skyrocketed.
A kilo of cocaine on the island has doubled since the early 2000s.

I learnt that, no…another person has not sprung up saying they’ve slept with me…
but that they know me.
And know me well.

I’ve even taken them out on a ride on one of my motorcycles.

I musta really been drunk, cuz…I don’t know this person.


I learnt, from a Filipino guy I just met…
That the Phillipines (yes the country)
is named after Charles V’s son, Philip II of Spain.

We discussed Catholicism to the Crusades.
Oh, which reminds me, I need to add him on Facebook.

What else?
Oh yeah, I learnt how corrupt the police are here in the Bahamas.


Didn’t just learn that.

I lie.


I learned that NOW it’s an automatic 4 years in prison if caught with an illegal firearm.

Yesterday, while reading the paper, I learned that firearms confiscated by the Bahamas Police Force
were later found and used in crimes over in the United States.

Are ya putting THOSE two together???

Oh the Bahamas.

You forever leave me entertained.

Class dismissed.


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Posted by on December 30, 2011 in Alcohol & Drugs, Bahamas


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小鬼 – Little Devil. Huh.

So, my mom was asking my dad if he asked me about the “favor” yet.
Not like she ain’t the EXACT distance from me as him…

But, we are on that…talk through dad mode I guess.
ESPECIALLY, HA, if she needs a favor from me.

She said in chinese…did you ask “小鬼.”
Which is pronounced, “Shaw jeee”

I always knew they were talking about me, whenever they’d say it.
But I never asked what it meant.
So I asked my father.

He said it means “little devil.”

Well, ya call someone something for most of their lives…

Guess they made ME a prophecy.


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Posted by on December 29, 2011 in Family


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Picking Out Pregnancy Tests……

I went out twice today.
First, was TOO early. Met up with Indy.
She was near my house so muscled me outta my bed.

So right now, I feel rather “off.”
When I’m here, and I don’t know why, I don’t get out of bed before 12PM.
Bed’s too comfy?
I dunno.
And she had me up at 10:30AM.


Then, I headed out to pick up a pregnancy test for a friend.
For a person that never needs one, I’ve bought so many, it’s not even funny.
I dunno why friends come to me to buy them.

Maybe they find the image of my discomfort while buying it, amusing.

LUCKY me, I bumped into everyone and their mother at the pharmacy.
A family friend and computer techy guy was in line in front of me
and let me go in front of him.
He’s this proper, well-mannered, a little too polite guy.
You could tell when he noticed my purchase.


My “innocent” reputation…RUINED!!!!!

I got an email from my exes brother yesterday.
Made me smile.
He started it off with “manitaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”
Which is an endearing way to say sister in Spanish.

I miss him.
We chatted for a bit and got all caught up with each other.
I like when little surprises pop up like that.

It warms my heart.

Yes, I’m sappy.
I blame my age.

Went to the food store and bumped into more friends.
One of them who’s wife is getting a little tired of the island.
They aren’t from here and both of them are young.
I feel bad for her.


Cuz, I’d die if I was stuck here YEAR ROUND!

I’m feeling quite alien…cuz SOMEBODY disturbed my slumber!

Gonna zone out on the couch and watch me my NY Ink.


Mi manito precioso.

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Posted by on December 29, 2011 in Family, Tattoos


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Right, Time to Bring the Sexy Back………

Gonna yank myself out of my rut of a routine and go catch some rays by the pool.
Need to start prepping myself for the New Year and BEYOND!!!

Indy and I were so out of it yesterday that we forgot our joint nail appointments.
Me, pedicure.
Her, manicure.

I hate feet.
Don’t like people looking at mine nor touching them…

So I needed “back up” and someone to “hold my hand.”


I’ve gotten my feet done, like twice before, but they were random little asian ladies.

Ah, three times. I forgot Thailand.
So L.A., N.Y.C. and Thailand.
Never home, and never someone I know.

I just told Indy I’m going tanning outside and she messaged me:

“Are you crazy? It’s FREEZING outside!”


Ah well. A girl’s gotta do, what a girl’s gotta do.
Maybe it’s the Vitamin D, the fresh air…or just the peace in my mind
but when I manage to pull myself outta the house
and under the sun…

I begin to mentally come out of my darkness.


with that, and without further a due…

Poolside it is!!!!


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Posted by on December 28, 2011 in Bahamas, Mental Chaos, Natural Highs


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Things that make you go…REALLY????

There are fans…and then, there are PSYCHOS!!!!!!!

Like, WOW.

No words.
Instantly made me think of ma girl Giselle.
Like OMG.

No words.

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Posted by on December 27, 2011 in Mental Chaos