The last seconds of Nelson’s life keep playing in my head.
It had me thinking about all the deaths I’ve had in my life.
All the death’s I’ve seen, all the sicknesses I’ve witnessed rob the strength and vitality out of loved ones
and all those whose lights went out when I was miles away.
It also had me thinking of how USELESS I was
just standing there watching him go.
No matter how much money you have, or power, or status
DEATH comes and takes without prejudice.
It does not care how much you cry
how much you love
or how much you pray
Nelson’s still in the house.
He’s in a shoebox my mom found to put him in.
My dad has been to busy running around so I don’t know what he wants to do with him.
We’re all the same.
Every living thing will one day become a motionless useless lump.
No more breaths
no more smiles
So why do most of us run around like we and the ones around us will live forever?
There’s an emptiness in the house now.
My eyes feel burnt from the tears.
It was just so unexpected and sudden.
What a beautiful feeling it is to be absolutely POWERLESS.
Watching a life being snatched so swiftly away without a thing that I could do.
And then, life goes on.
Everything still moves as it did when he was alive.
How small the feeling of a life once it is gone.
Funny how when a person dies all the moments of your life with them
begin slideshowing through your thoughts.
All those moments, ALL those years
now nothing more than an object in a shoebox ready to be disposed of.
And in reality, are any of US any different than Nelson when we’re gone?
Our life once it’s over, just ends in a BIGGER, fancier SHOEBOX.
Out of everything in our lives, TIME is our worst enemy
cuz you never know when the last second, will be your own.
When we’re gone, it doesn’t matter how pretty or expensive the SHOEBOX of a life is
we wish to paint for ourselves…
cuz it still becomes a four-cornered darkened wall in the end.